Sketchbook #2: I'm Scared

Plus, vote on a future newsletter topic

Hi,

I’ve had an anxious week. My book is officially out in four days. Don’t get me wrong: I’m excited. But I also feel… scared. Maybe it’s because the stories in it are deeply personal and I feel like I’m standing naked before the world and asking people to look, no, really, look, come closer.  

Or maybe the fear is stemming from the newness of it all. I’ve never put so much into a project, never waited patiently as this one big day inched closer and closer — a day so near I could reach out and touch it.

Or maybe it’s because I have a habit of comparing myself to other writers and artists.

Or maybe it’s all of the above, plus my predisposition for overthinking and worrying and hoping I’m good enough for whatever impossible standard I’ve set for myself. 

Or maybe, or maybe, or maybe.

Through the uncertainty, two things have helped:

• Repeating my favorite mantra to myself: “No feeling lasts forever.”

• Talking/drawing/writing about it, including this page from my sketchbook:

It also helps me remember some of the good :)

I know my emotions will change. I know I can hold many feelings at once. I know time will pass and big moments will come and go and I will be okay. 

Here is my comic diary from the week, a sweet reminder there were some lovely moments amongst the anxious waves.

Thank you for reading today. Substack continues to be such a safe space. I am really grateful for all of you. 

And don’t think I forgot this month’s comic poll:

To end, here are some dogs I drew after feeling totally inspired at the Introvert Drawing Club — thank you for having me,

Beth Spencer

!

They’re wearing little sweaters because of course they are!

PS: If you’re enjoying the more ~vulnerable~ sketchbook series, it’s free through the end of the month! 

PPS: If you pre-ordered your book and haven’t received your exclusive comic, head over here to download it! Valid until 4/16 :)